WHO’S REALLY RAISING YOUR CHILD? (Sunday Sermon)

By Ewere Okonta

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eobnewmedia@gmail.com

eob.org.ng

There was a time, not too distant, when parents raised children, and the community reinforced values. Today, the community is silent, the home is distracted, and the algorithm has taken over like an uninvited guardian with unlimited access.

Let’s not sugarcoat it: we didn’t just lose control, we surrendered it.

In this new digital order, Instagram is no longer just an app; it is a lifestyle curator. TikTok has become a classroom without a curriculum. YouTube has turned into a 24-hour mentor, uncensored, unfiltered, and often unfit. What used to be whispered in corners is now screamed on timelines. Modesty is mocked. Decency is downgraded. And shame? That word has quietly exited the dictionary.

What changed?

We did.

We handed over smartphones like birthday gifts without attaching responsibility. We replaced guidance with gadgets, conversations with connectivity, and presence with data bundles. Now, we are raising children who are globally connected but emotionally disconnected.

Let’s talk about the uncomfortable truth.

Children are growing up faster than their minds can process. A 13-year-old girl now understands “engagement metrics” but struggles with self-worth. A 14-year-old boy knows more about explicit content than about emotional intelligence. They are digitally fluent but morally confused.

And we, yes, we are watching it unfold in real time.

Scroll through social media and you’ll find teenagers packaging themselves for validation. Bodies are brands. Attention is currency. And dignity? Negotiable.

The tragedy is not just what they are doing, it’s what they are becoming.

A generation raised on likes but starved of love.

A generation loud online but lost within.

A generation exposed to everything yet grounded in nothing.

We blame the platforms. We blame society. We blame “this generation.”

But let’s be honest, this didn’t start with them. It started with us.

We normalized absence in the name of hustle.

We excused indiscipline in the name of freedom.

We avoided correction in the name of modernity.

We wanted to be “cool parents” instead of responsible ones. We traded authority for approval, and now we are paying the price.

Let’s go deeper.

This is no longer just a parenting issue; it is a cultural emergency.

When a child learns about sex before they learn about self-control, something is broken.

When validation comes from strangers instead of parents, something is missing.

When children feel safer online than at home, something is wrong.

And yet, many homes remain quiet, too quiet.

Fathers are physically present but emotionally unavailable.

Mothers are overwhelmed, juggling survival and supervision.

Family dinners have become phone charging sessions.

Everyone is online. No one is truly connected.

And then we wonder, who is shaping their minds?

The answer is simple: whoever has their attention has their future.

Right now, that “whoever” is not you.

It is influencers who profit from confusion.

It is algorithms that reward extremity.

It is strangers who don’t know your child, but know exactly how to keep them hooked.

Let that sink in.

This is not about demonizing technology. Technology is a tool. But a tool in the wrong hands, or without guidance, becomes a weapon.

So, what do we do?

We return to intentional parenting.

Not perfect parenting, intentional parenting.

We set boundaries and stand by them.

We delay exposure until maturity can handle it.

We have uncomfortable conversations, early and often.

We model the values we want to see, not just preach them.

We stop outsourcing character development.

Because no app can teach discipline.

No influencer can instill values.

No algorithm can replace a parent’s voice.

Let’s be clear: children are not confused, they are unled.

And leadership starts at home.

This is not a call for shame, it is a call for awakening.

We don’t need to raise saints. But we must stop raising strangers in our own homes.

Be present. Be firm. Be involved.

Because if you don’t define your child, the world will. And the world is not interested in their soul, only their attention.

So, I ask you, again, and without apology:

Who is raising your child?

Because whoever it is… is shaping the future you will one day have to live with.

Until Sunday,

This is the Sunday sermon from my holy pulpit.

Ewere Okonta is the CEO of EOB Media, a family values advocate, and writes from the Department of Business Administration, University of Delta, Agbor.

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